«Impius cum in profundum venerit, contemnit» — "The wicked man, when he has fallen into the depths, despises" (Prov. 18:3).
Point I
One of the greatest harms that the sin of Adam caused us was the evil inclination to sin. This made St. Paul weep, seeing himself driven by concupiscence toward those very evils that he abhorred: «Video aliam legem in membris meis... captivantem me in lege peccati» — "I see another law in my members... taking me captive in the law of sin" (Rom. 7:23). And so for us, infected by this concupiscence and beset by so many enemies who drive us to evil, it is most difficult to reach the blessed homeland without fault. Now, given such frailty as ours, I ask: what would you say of a traveler who had to cross the sea in a great storm in a half-broken boat, and who then wished to load it with a weight that, even without a storm and however strong the boat might be, would still be enough to sink it? What would you predict for this man's life? Now say the same of a man with an evil habit who, having to cross the sea of this life (a storm-tossed sea where so many are lost) in a weak and ruined boat such as our flesh, to which we are joined, then wishes to weigh it down with habitual sins. It is very difficult for such a man to be saved, because the evil habit blinds the mind, hardens the heart, and thereby easily makes him obstinate until death.
First, the evil habit "blinds." Why is it that the saints always seek light from God and tremble at the thought of becoming the worst sinners in the world? Because they know that if they lose the light for a single moment, they can commit any wickedness whatever. How is it that so many Christians have obstinately insisted on living in sin until at last they are damned? «Excaecavit eos malitia eorum» — "Their malice has blinded them" (Wis. 2:21). Sin took away their sight, and so they were lost. Every sin brings blindness with it; as sins increase, the blindness increases. God is our light;
the more, then, the soul withdraws from God, the blinder it remains. «Ossa eius implebuntur vitiis» — "His bones shall be filled with vices" (Job 20:11). Just as the light of the sun cannot enter a vessel full of earth, so the divine light cannot enter a heart full of vices.
And so we see that certain dissolute sinners lose the light and go from sin to sin, and no longer even think of amending. «In circuitu impii ambulant» — "The wicked walk round about" (Ps. 11:9). Once fallen into that dark pit, the wretches can do nothing but sins, they speak of nothing but sins, they think of nothing but sinning, and they almost no longer recognize that sin is evil. «Ipsa consuetudo mali non sinit peccatores videre malum, quod faciunt» — "The very habit of evil does not let sinners see the evil they do," says St. Augustine. So they live as though they no longer believed there were a God, a paradise, a hell, an eternity.
And behold, the sin that once inspired horror, with the evil habit no longer horrifies. «Pone illos, ut rotam et sicut stipulam ante faciem venti» — "Make them like a wheel, and like stubble before the face of the wind" (Ps. 82:14). See, says St. Gregory, with what ease a wisp of straw is moved by every wind, even a light one; so too you will see someone who before (before he fell) resisted at least for a while and fought against the temptation, but who, once the evil habit is formed, falls at once at every temptation, at every occasion of sin that comes his way. And why? Because the evil habit has taken away his light. St. Anselm says that the devil deals with certain sinners as does one who holds a bird tied to a string: he lets it fly, but when he wishes, he brings it down to the ground again; such are (as the saint says) those habituated to evil: «Pravo usu irretiti ab hoste tenentur, volantes in eadem vitia deiiciuntur» — "Entangled by evil use, they are held fast by the enemy; as they fly, they are cast down into the same vices"
(Ap. Edinor. in Vita lib. 2). Some, adds St. Bernardine of Siena (tom. 4, Serm. 15), will go on sinning even without occasion. The saint says that those habituated to evil become like windmills, which «rotantur omni vento» — "are turned by every wind"; and moreover they turn even when there is no grain to grind, and even when the master does not want them to turn. You will see a habituated sinner who, without occasion, goes on harboring evil thoughts, without pleasure and almost without willing it, dragged by force by the evil habit. St. John Chrysostom: «Dura res est consuetudo, quae nonnunquam nolentes committere cogit illicita» — "Habit is a hard thing, which sometimes forces us to commit unlawful deeds even against our will." Yes, because (as St. Augustine says) the evil habit then becomes a kind of necessity: «Dum consuetudini non resistitur, facta est necessitas» — "So long as habit is not resisted, it becomes necessity." And as St. Bernardine adds, «usus vertitur in naturam» — "use turns into nature"; hence, just as breathing is necessary to man, so to those habituated to evil, made slaves of sin, sinning seems to become necessary. I said "slaves": there are servants, who serve by force but for pay; slaves, on the other hand, serve by force without pay; to this some wretches come — they come to sin without pleasure.
«Impius, cum in profundum venerit, contemnit» — "The wicked man, when he has fallen into the depths, despises" (Prov. 18:3). St. John Chrysostom explains this precisely of the man habituated to evil who, set in that pit of darkness, despises corrections, sermons, censures, hell, God — he despises everything; the wretch becomes like a vulture which, rather than leave the carcass, is content to let itself be killed by the hunters upon it. Father Recupito relates that a man condemned to death, while being led to the gallows, raised his eyes, saw a young woman, and consented to an evil thought. Father Gisolfo likewise relates that a blasphemer, also condemned to death, when thrown from the ladder, burst forth in a blasphemy. St. Bernard goes so far as to say that for those with an evil habit it is no longer of use to pray, and they must be wept over as damned. But how can they wish to escape from their precipice if they can no longer see? A miracle of grace is needed. The wretches will open their eyes in hell, when opening them will no longer avail, except to weep more bitterly over their folly.
Affections and Prayers
My God, You have distinguished me with Your benefits, blessing me more than others; I have distinguished You with offenses, insulting You more than any other person known to me. O sorrowful Heart of my Redeemer, who on the cross were so afflicted and tormented by the sight of my sins, give me, through Your merits, a lively knowledge and sorrow for my faults. Ah, my Jesus, I am full of vices, but You are almighty; surely You can make me full of Your holy love. To You, then, I entrust myself, who are an infinite goodness and mercy. I repent, O sovereign Good, of having offended You. Oh, would that I had died first and had never given You displeasure! I forgot You, but You did not forget me: I see it by this light that You now give me. Since, then, You give me the light, give me also the strength to be faithful to You. I promise You that I would rather die a thousand times than ever turn my back on You again; but my hopes rest upon Your help: «In te, Domine, speravi, non confundar in aeternum» — "In You, O Lord, have I hoped; let me not be confounded forever." In You I hope, my Jesus, nevermore to see myself entangled in sin and deprived of Your grace.
To You I turn also, O Mary, my Lady: «In te, Domina, speravi, non confundar in aeternum» — "In You, O Lady, have I hoped; let me not be confounded forever." In Your intercession I trust, O my hope, nevermore to see myself an enemy of Your Son. Ah, pray to Him that He may let me die rather than abandon me to this most grievous misfortune.
Point II
Moreover, the evil habit hardens the heart. «Cor durum efficit consuetudo peccandi» — "The habit of sinning makes the heart hard" (Cornelius a Lapide). And God justly permits it in punishment for the resistance made to His calls. St. Paul says that the Lord «cuius vult miseretur, et quem vult indurat» — "has mercy on whom He wills, and whom He wills He hardens" (Rom. 9:18). St. Augustine explains: «Obduratio Dei est nolle misereri» — "God's hardening is His unwillingness to show mercy." It is not that God hardens the man with the evil habit, but that He withdraws the grace of God from him, in punishment for the ingratitude he has shown toward His graces; and thus his heart remains hard and become as it were of stone. «Cor eius indurabitur tanquam lapis, et stringetur quasi malleatoris incus» — "His heart shall be hardened like a stone, and bound fast like the smith's anvil" (Job 41:15). Hence it will happen that, where others are moved to tenderness and weep on hearing preached the rigor of the divine judgment, the pains of the damned, the Passion of Jesus Christ, the man with the evil habit will not be moved at all; he will speak of these things and hear them spoken of with indifference, as though they were things that did not concern him; and under such blows he will become harder still. «Et stringetur quasi malleatoris incus» — "And he shall be bound fast like the smith's anvil."
Even sudden deaths, earthquakes, thunder, and lightning will no longer frighten him: rather than awaken him and bring him to his senses, they will sooner lull him into that sleep of death in which he lies lost. «Ab increpatione tua, Deus Iacob, dormitaverunt» — "At Your rebuke, O God of Jacob, they have slept their sleep" (Ps. 75:7). The evil habit little by little destroys even the remorse of conscience. To the man with the evil habit, the most enormous sins seem as nothing. St. Augustine: «Peccata quanvis horrenda, cum in consuetudinem veniunt, parva, aut nulla esse videntur» — "Sins, however horrendous, when they become habitual, seem small or nothing at all." The doing of evil naturally carries with it a certain blush of shame, but St. Jerome says that those with the evil habit lose even the blush in sinning: «Qui ne pudorem quidem habent in delictis» — "Who have not even shame in their sins." St. Peter compares the man with the evil habit to the sow that wallows in the mire: «Sus lota in volutabro luti» — "The sow that is washed returns to her wallowing in the mire" (2 Pet. 2:22). Just as the pig, wallowing in the mud, does not smell its stench, so it is with the man of evil habit: the stench that makes itself felt by everyone else, he alone does not smell. And since the mud has even taken away his sight, what wonder is it, says St. Bernardine, that he does not come to his senses, even while God scourges him? «Populus immergit se in peccatis, sicut sus in volutabro luti; quid mirum si Dei flagellantis futura iudicia non cognoscit?» — "A people plunges itself into sins like the sow in the miry wallow; what wonder if it does not recognize the future judgments of the God who scourges it?" (St. Bernardine of Siena, pt. 2, p. 182). Hence it happens that, instead of grieving over his sins, he rejoices in them, laughs at them, and boasts of them. «Laetantur, cum malefecerint» — "They rejoice when they have done evil"
(Prov. 2:14). «Quasi per risum stultus operatur scelus» — "The fool works wickedness as it were in sport" (Prov. 10:23). What signs are these of such diabolical hardness? St. Thomas of Villanova says they are all signs of damnation: «Induratio, damnationis indicium» — "Hardening is a mark of damnation." My brother, tremble lest the same befall you. If you have contracted any evil habit, strive to come out of it quickly, now that God calls you. And while your conscience still stings you, be of good cheer, for it is a sign that God has not yet abandoned you. But amend, and come out quickly; for otherwise the wound will turn to gangrene, and you will be lost.
Affections and Prayers
O Lord, how shall I ever be able to thank You as I ought for so many graces You have granted me? How many times have You called me, and I resisted? Instead of being grateful to You and loving You for having freed me from hell and called me with such love, I have gone on provoking You to anger, heaping insults upon You. No, my God, I will no longer outrage Your patience; enough have I offended You. You alone, who are infinite goodness, have been able to bear with me until now. But I see already that You can bear with me no longer — and You are right. Forgive me, then, my Lord and my sovereign Good, all the insults I have offered You, of which I repent with all my heart; and I resolve for the future never to offend You again. Must I perhaps go on provoking You forever? Ah, be reconciled with me, O God of my soul — not for my merits, which deserve nothing but chastisements and hell, but for the merits of Your Son and my Redeemer, in whom I place all my hope. For the love, then, of Jesus Christ, receive me into Your grace, and grant me holy perseverance in Your love. Detach me from impure affections, and draw me wholly to You. I love You, O sovereign God, O sovereign Lover of souls, who are worthy of infinite love. Oh, that I had always loved You!
O Mary, my Mother, grant that this life which remains to me may serve me no more to offend Your Son, but only to love Him and to weep for the offenses I have given Him.
Point III
Once the light has been lost and the heart has been hardened, it will morally follow that the sinner comes to a bad end and dies obstinate in his sin. «Cor durum habebit male in novissimo» — "A hard heart shall fare ill in the end" (Sir. 3:27). The just keep walking along the straight way. «Rectus callis iusti ad ambulandum» — "The path of the just is straight to walk in" (Isa. 26:7). Those with the evil habit, on the contrary, go always in a circle. «In circuitu impii ambulant» — "The wicked walk round about" (Ps. 11:9). They leave sin for a little while, and then return to it. To such men St. Bernard announces damnation: «Vae homini qui sequitur hunc circuitum» — "Woe to the man who follows this circuit" (Serm. 12 on Ps. 90). But such a one will say: I intend to amend before death. Here, however, lies the difficulty: that a man of evil habit should amend, even should he reach old age. The Holy Spirit says: «Adolescens iuxta viam suam, etiam cum senuerit, non recedet ab ea» — "A young man according to his way, even when he has grown old, will not depart from it" (Prov. 22:6). The reason is, as St. Thomas of Villanova tells us (Conc. 4, Dom. Quadr. 4), that our strength is very weak. «Et erit fortitudo nostra ut favilla stupae» — "And our strength shall be as a spark of tow" (Isa. 1:31). Whence it follows, as the saint says, that the soul deprived of the grace of God cannot long remain without new sins: «Quo fit, ut anima a gratia destituta diu evadere ulteriora peccata non possit» — "Whence it happens that a soul bereft of grace cannot for long escape further sins." But beyond this, what folly would it be in a man who chose to gamble and deliberately lose all he had, hoping to win it back at the last game? Such is the folly of one who goes on living amid sins and hopes, on the last day of his life, to set everything right. Can the Ethiopian or the leopard change the color of his skin? And how shall he be able to lead a good life who has made a long habit of evil? «Si mutare potest Aethiops pellem suam, aut pardus varietates suas, et vos poteritis benefacere, cum didiceritis malum» — "If the Ethiopian can change his skin, or the leopard his spots, you also may do well, when you have learned evil" (Jer. 13:23). Thus it happens that the man habituated to evil in the end abandons himself to despair, and so finishes his life. «Qui vero mentis est durae, corruet in malum» — "But he that is of a hard heart shall fall into evil" (Prov. 28:14).
St. Gregory, on that passage of Job — «Concidit me vulnere super vulnus, irruit in me quasi gigas» — "He has cut me down with wound upon wound; He has rushed in upon me like a giant" (Job 16:15) — the saint says: If a man is assailed by an enemy, at the first wound he receives he may still be able to defend himself; but the more wounds he receives, the more he loses his strength, until at last he is slain. So it is with sin: at the first and second time, some strength remains to the sinner (it being always understood, through the grace of God that assists him); but if he continues to sin, sin becomes a giant — «irruit quasi gigas», "it rushes in like a giant". The sinner, on the other hand, finding himself weaker and with so many wounds, how shall he escape death? Sin, in the words of Jeremiah, is like a great stone that crushes the soul: «Et posuerunt lapidem super me» — "And they laid a stone upon me" (Lam. 3:53). Now St. Bernard says that it is as difficult for a man with an evil habit to rise again as it is for one who has fallen beneath a great rock and has not the strength to remove it and free himself: «Difficile surgit, quem moles malae consuetudinis premit» — "He rises with difficulty whom the mass of evil habit weighs down."
Therefore, that man with the evil habit will say: am I then without hope? No, you are not without hope, if you wish to remedy it. But an author rightly says that in the gravest illnesses the gravest remedies are needed: «Praestat in magnis morbis a magnis auxiliis initium medendi sumere» — "In great illnesses one must begin the cure with great remedies" (Cardin. Meth. cap. 16). If a sick man who is in danger of death and does not wish to take remedies, because he does not know the gravity of his illness, were told by the physician: Friend, you are dead if you do not take that medicine. What would the sick man reply? Here I am, he would say, ready to take anything; it is a matter of life. My Christian, I say the same to you, if you are habituated to some sin: you are ill, and you are one of those sick who «raro sanantur» — "are rarely healed" (as St. Thomas of Villanova says); you are close to damning yourself. If, however, you wish to heal yourself, there is a remedy; but you must not expect a miracle of grace; you must exert yourself on your part to remove the occasions, to flee evil companions, to resist by commending yourself to God when you are tempted; you must take the means: confessing often, reading a little spiritual book every day, taking up devotion to Mary Most Holy, praying to her continually to obtain for you the strength not to fall back. You must exert yourself, otherwise the threat of the Lord against the obstinate will overtake you: «In peccato vestro moriemini» — "You shall die in your sin" (John 8:21). And if you do not remedy it, now that God gives you this light, you will hardly be able to remedy it afterward. Hear God calling you: «Lazare, exi foras» — "Lazarus, come forth." Poor sinner already dead, come out of this dark pit of your evil life. Answer quickly; and give yourself to God; and tremble lest this be the last call for you.
Affections and Prayers
Ah my God, what then — do I wish to wait until You actually abandon me and send me to hell? Ah Lord, wait for me, for I wish to change my life and give myself to You. Tell me what I must do, for I wish to do it. O blood of Jesus, help me. O Mary, advocate of sinners, come to my aid. And You, Eternal Father, for the merits of Jesus and of Mary, have pity on me. I repent, O God of infinite goodness, of having offended You, and I love You above all things. Forgive me for the love of Jesus Christ and give me Your love. Give me also a great fear of my ruin, if I should offend You again. Light, my God, light and strength. I hope for everything from Your mercy. You granted me so many graces when I was going far from You; much more do I hope, now that I return to You resolved to love nothing but You. I love You, my God, my life, my all.
I love You too, my Mother Mary; to You I entrust my soul; preserve it by Your intercession from falling again into disfavor with God.