«Ignoras, quoniam benignitas Dei ad poenitentiam te adducit?» — "Do you not know that the goodness of God leads you to repentance?" (Rom. 2:4).
Point I
We read in the parable of the cockle in St. Matthew (ch. 13) that when the cockle had grown up in a field together with the wheat, the servants wanted to go and root it out: «Vis, imus, et colligimus ea?» — "Do You wish us to go and gather it?" But the master answered: No, let it grow, and then it will be gathered and sent to the fire: «In tempore messis dicam messoribus, colligite primum zizania, et alligate ea in fasciculos ad comburendum» — "At the time of the harvest I will say to the reapers: Gather up first the cockle, and bind it into bundles to be burned." From this parable we learn, on the one hand, the patience the Lord exercises toward sinners; and on the other, the rigor He exercises toward the obstinate. St. Augustine says that the devil deceives men in two ways: «Desperando, et sperando» — "by despairing and by hoping." After the sinner has sinned, the devil tempts him to despair through the terror of divine justice; but before he sins, he draws the soul to sin through the hope of divine mercy. Therefore the saint warns everyone: «Post peccatum spera misericordiam; ante peccatum pertimesce iustitiam» — "After sin, hope for mercy; before sin, dread justice." Yes, for he does not deserve mercy who makes use of the mercy of God to offend Him. Mercy is shown to the one who fears God, not to the one who avails himself of it in order not to fear Him. He who offends justice, says the Abulense, can have recourse to mercy; but he who offends mercy itself, to whom shall he have recourse?
It is hard to find a sinner so desperate that he truly wills to damn himself. Sinners wish to sin without losing the hope of saving themselves. They sin and say: God is merciful; I will commit this sin, and then I will confess it. «Bonus est Deus, faciam quod mihi placet» — "God is good; I will do what pleases me" — this is how sinners speak, writes St. Augustine (Tract. 33 on John). But O God, so spoke so many who are now already damned.
Do not say, says the Lord: Great are the mercies God shows; however many sins I commit, with one act of sorrow I shall be forgiven. «Et ne dicas: miseratio Domini magna est, multitudinis peccatorum meorum miserebitur» — "And do not say: The mercy of the Lord is great; He will have mercy on the multitude of my sins" (Sir. 5:6). Do not say it, says God; and why? «Misericordia enim, et ira ab illo cito proximant, et in peccatores respicit ira illius» — "For mercy and wrath quickly come forth from Him, and His wrath looks upon sinners" (Ibid.). The mercy of God is infinite, but the acts of this mercy (which are the mercies He shows) are finite. God is merciful, but He is also just. «Ego sum iustus, et misericors» — "I am just and merciful," the Lord said one day to St. Bridget; «peccatores tantum misericordem me existimant» — "sinners think Me only merciful." Sinners, writes St. Basil, wish to consider God only by half: «Bonus est Dominus, sed etiam iustus; nolite Deum ex dimidia parte cogitare» — "The Lord is good, but also just; do not conceive of God by half." To bear with one who makes use of the mercy of God to offend Him the more — this, said Father Avila, would not be mercy but a failure of justice. Mercy is promised to those who fear God, not to those who abuse it. «Et misericordia eius timentibus eum» — "And His mercy is to those who fear Him," as Mary Most Holy sang. To the obstinate, justice is threatened; and since (says St. Augustine) God does not lie in His promises, neither does He lie in His threats: «Qui verus est in promittendo, verus est in minando» — "He who is true in promising is true in threatening."
Beware, says St. John Chrysostom, when the devil (but not God) promises you the divine mercy so that you may sin: «Cave ne unquam canem illum suscipias, qui misericordiam Dei pollicetur» — "Take care never to welcome that dog who promises the mercy of God" (Hom. 50 to the People of Antioch). Woe, adds St. Augustine, to him who hopes in order to sin: «Sperat, ut peccet; vae a perversa spe» — "He hopes in order to sin; woe from a perverse hope" (On Ps. 144). Oh, how many this vain hope has deceived and ruined, says the saint. «Dinumerari non possunt, quantos haec inanis spei umbra deceperit» — "They cannot be numbered whom this empty shadow of hope has deceived." Poor the one who abuses the pity of God to outrage Him the more!
St. Bernard says that Lucifer was punished by God so quickly because he rebelled while hoping to receive no punishment for it. King Manasseh was a sinner, then he was converted, and God forgave him; Amon his son, seeing his father so easily forgiven, gave himself over to an evil life in the hope of pardon; but for Amon there was no mercy. For this reason St. John Chrysostom also says that Judas was lost because he sinned trusting in the gentleness of Jesus Christ: «Fidit in lenitate magistri» — "He trusted in the leniency of the Master." In short, if God bears with sinners, He does not bear with them forever. If it were that God always bore with them, no one would be damned; but the more common opinion is that the greater part even of Christians (speaking of adults) are damned: «Lata porta et spatiosa via est, quae ducit ad perditionem, et multi intrant per eam» — "Wide is the gate and broad is the way that leads to perdition, and many enter through it" (Matt. 7:13).
Whoever offends God in the hope of pardon, «irrisor est non poenitens» — "is a mocker, not a penitent," says St. Augustine. But on the other hand St. Paul says that God does not let Himself be mocked: «Deus non irridetur» — "God is not mocked" (Gal. 6:7). It would be mocking God to go on offending Him whenever one pleases and then go to paradise. «Quae enim seminaverit homo, haec et metet» — "For whatever a man sows, that also shall he reap" (Ibid. 8). Whoever sows sins has no reason to hope for anything but punishment and hell. The net by which the devil drags to hell nearly all those Christians who are damned is this deception, with which he says to them: Sin freely, for even with all your sins you will be saved. But God curses the one who sins in the hope of pardon: «Maledictus homo qui peccat in spe» — "Cursed is the man who sins in hope." The hope of the sinner after sin, when there is repentance, is dear to God, but the hope of the obstinate is an abomination to God: «Et spes illorum abominatio» — "And their hope shall be an abomination" (Job 11:20). Such a hope provokes God to punish, just as that servant would provoke his master who offended him precisely because the master is good.
Affections and Prayers
Ah, my God, behold, I have been one of those who have offended You because You were good to me. Ah, Lord, wait for me; do not yet abandon me, for I hope by Your grace never to provoke You again to abandon me. I repent, O infinite goodness, of having offended You and of having so abused Your patience. I thank You for having waited for me until now. From this day forward I no longer wish to betray You, as I have done in the past. You have borne with me so long so that one day You might see me become a lover of Your goodness. Behold, that day has already come, I hope. I love You above all things, and I esteem Your grace more than all the kingdoms of the world: rather than lose it, I am ready to lose my life a thousand times. My God, for love of Jesus Christ, give me holy perseverance until death, together with Your holy love. Do not permit me to betray You again and cease to love You.
Mary, You are my hope; obtain for me this perseverance; and I ask nothing more of You.
Point II
Someone will say: God has shown me so many mercies in the past, so I hope He will show me the same in the future. But I answer: And because He has shown you so many mercies, do you for that reason want to return to offending Him? Then (St. Paul says to you), do you thus despise the goodness and patience of God? Do you not know that the Lord has borne with you until now, not so that you should go on offending Him, but so that you should weep for the evil you have done? «An divitias bonitatis eius, et patientiae contemnis? Ignoras, quoniam benignitas Dei ad poenitentiam te adducit?» — "Do you despise the riches of His goodness and patience? Do you not know that the kindness of God leads you to repentance?" (Rom. 2:4). When you, trusting in the divine mercy, refuse to put an end to it, the Lord will put an end to it Himself. «Nisi conversi fueritis, arcum suum vibrabit» — "Unless you are converted, He will brandish His bow" (Ps. 7). «Mea est ultio et ego retribuam in tempore» — "Vengeance is Mine, and I will repay in due time" (Deut. 32:35). God waits, but when the time of vengeance arrives, He waits no longer and punishes.
«Propterea exspectat Dominus, ut misereatur vestri» — "Therefore the Lord waits, that He may have mercy on you" (Isa. 30:18). God waits for the sinner so that he may amend; but when He sees that the sinner uses the time given him to weep for his sins to increase them instead, then He calls that very time to judge him. «Vocavit adversum me tempus» — "He has summoned the time against me" (Lam. 1:15). St. Gregory says: «Ipsum tempus ad iudicandum vertit» — "He turns the very time to judgment." Thus the very time given and the very mercies shown will serve to have him punished with greater rigor and abandoned more quickly. «Curavimus Babylonem, et non est sanata, derelinquamus eam» — "We would have healed Babylon, but she is not healed; let us forsake her" (Jer. 51:9). And how does God abandon him? Either He sends him death and lets him die in sin; or He deprives him of abundant graces and leaves him with sufficient grace alone, with which the sinner could indeed save himself but will not be saved. The blinded mind, the hardened heart, the evil habit formed will render his salvation morally impossible; and so he will remain, if not absolutely, at least morally abandoned. «Auferam sepem eius, et erit in direptionem» — "I will take away its hedge, and it shall be laid waste" (Isa. 5:5). Oh, what a punishment! What does it mean when the owner tears down the hedge and lets anyone who wishes enter the vineyard, men and beasts alike? It is a sign that he abandons it. So does God when He abandons a soul: He takes away the hedge of holy fear and of remorse of conscience, and leaves it in darkness; and then all the monsters of the vices will enter that soul. «Posuisti tenebras, et facta est nox, in ipsa pertransibunt omnes bestiae silvae» — "You have made darkness, and it has become night; in it all the beasts of the forest shall pass through" (Ps. 103:20). And the abandoned sinner who finds himself in that darkness will despise everything: the grace of God, paradise, warnings, excommunications; he will mock even his own damnation. «Impius, cum in profundum peccatorum venerit, contemnit» — "The wicked man, when he has come into the depth of sins, despises" (Prov. 18:3).
God will leave him in this life without punishing him, but not punishing him will be his greatest punishment. «Misereamur impio, et non discet iustitiam» — "Let us show mercy to the wicked, and he will not learn justice" (Isa. 26:10). St. Bernard says on this text: «Misericordiam hanc ego nolo; super omnem iram miseratio ista» — "This mercy I do not want; this pity is worse than all wrath" (Sermon 42 on the Song of Songs). Oh, what a punishment it is when God leaves the sinner in the grip of his sin and seems no longer to ask him for an account! «Secundum multitudinem irae suae non quaeret» — "According to the multitude of His wrath, He will not call him to account" (Ps. 9). And it seems that He is not angry with him. «Auferetur zelus meus a te, et quiescam, nec irascar amplius» — "My jealousy shall depart from you, and I will be at rest and be angry no more" (Ezek. 16:42). And it seems that He lets him attain everything he desires on this earth. «Et dimisi eos secundum desideria cordis eorum» — "And I let them go according to the desires of their hearts" (Ps. 80). Poor sinners who prosper in this life! It is a sign that God is waiting to make them victims of His justice in eternal life. Jeremiah asks: «Quare via impiorum prosperatur?» — "Why does the way of the wicked prosper?" (Jer. 12:1). And then he answers: «Congregas eos quasi gregem ad victoriam» — "You gather them like a flock for the slaughter." There is no greater punishment than when God permits a sinner to add sins to sins, as David says: «Appone iniquitatem super iniquitatem... deleantur de libro viventium» — "Add iniquity upon iniquity... let them be blotted out of the book of the living" (Ps. 66:28). On which St. Robert Bellarmine says: «Nulla poena maior, quam cum peccatum est poena peccati» — "There is no greater punishment than when sin is the punishment of sin." It would have been better for some of these unhappy souls if the Lord had let them die after the first sin; for, dying later, they will have as many hells as the sins they have committed.
Affections and Prayers
My God, in this miserable state I now see that I have deserved to remain, deprived of Your grace and deprived of light; but seeing the light that You now give me, and feeling myself called by You to penance, is a sign that You have not yet abandoned me. And since You have not abandoned me, come then, my Lord, increase Your mercies upon my soul, increase the light, increase in me the desire to serve You and to love You. Change me, O almighty God, and from the traitor and rebel that I have been, make me a great lover of Your goodness, so that one day I may come to heaven to praise Your mercies forever. You therefore wish to pardon me, and I desire nothing but pardon from You and Your love. I repent, O infinite goodness, of having caused You so much displeasure. I love You, O supreme good, because You command me to; I love You, because You are well worthy of it. Ah, my Redeemer, by the merits of Your blood, make Yourself loved by a sinner whom You have loved so much and borne with such patience for so many years. I hope for everything from Your mercy. I hope to love You always, from this day forward until death and for all eternity. «Misericordias Domini in aeternum cantabo» — "I will sing the mercies of the Lord forever." I will praise Your mercy forever, my Jesus.
And I will praise Your mercy forever, O Mary, who have obtained so many graces for me: I acknowledge them all as coming from Your intercession. Continue now, my Lady, to help me and to obtain for me holy perseverance.
Point III
It is related in the life of Father Luigi la Nusa that in Palermo there were two friends. One day, as they were out walking, one of them, named Cesare, who was an actor, seeing the other lost in thought, said to him: "How long is it since you went to confession, that you have become so troubled? Listen," he then added, "know that Father la Nusa once told me that God was giving me twelve years of life, and that if I did not amend within that time, I would die a bad death. I have traveled through many parts of the world, I have suffered illnesses—especially one that brought me to the very end—but in this month, in which the twelve years are completed, I feel better than in all the rest of my life." Then he invited him to come on Saturday to hear a new comedy he had written. Now what happened? On that Saturday, which was November 24, 1668, just as he was about to go on stage, he was struck by apoplexy and died instantly, expiring in the arms of a woman who was also an actress; and so the comedy ended. Now let us come to ourselves. My brother, when the devil tempts you to sin again—if you wish to damn yourself, it is within your power to sin—but do not then say that you wish to be saved; while you wish to sin, consider yourself damned, and picture to yourself that at that moment God is writing your condemnation and saying to you: «Quid ultra debui facere vineae meae, et non feci?» — "What more ought I to have done for my vineyard, that I have not done?" (Isa. 5:4). Ungrateful one, what more should I have done for you that I have not done? Come then, since you wish to be damned, be damned; the fault is yours.
But you will say: And where is the mercy of God? Ah, wretched man, does it not seem to you mercy on God's part that He has borne with you for so many years amid so many sins? You should keep your face always on the ground, thanking Him and saying: «Misericordiae Domini, quia non sumus consumti» — "It is of the mercies of the Lord that we are not consumed" (Lam. 3:22). By committing a single mortal sin, you have committed a greater crime than if you had trampled underfoot the first monarch of the earth; and you have committed so many that, if the injuries you have done to God you had done to a brother of your own flesh, not even he would have put up with you. God has not only waited for you, but has called you so many times and invited you to His pardon. «Quid ultra debui facere?» — "What more ought I to have done?" If God had needed you, or if you had done Him some great favor, could He have shown you greater mercy? This being so, if you return to offending Him, you will cause all His mercy to be turned into fury and chastisement.
If that fig tree which its owner found without fruit, after the year granted for its cultivation, had still yielded no fruit at all, who could ever have hoped that the Lord would give it more time and spare it from the knife? Hear, then, what St. Augustine warns you: «O arbor infructuosa, dilata est securis, noli esse secura, amputaberis» — "O fruitless tree, the axe has been delayed; do not be secure, for you will be cut down." The chastisement (says the saint) has been deferred for you, not removed; if you go on abusing the divine mercy, «amputaberis» — "you will be cut down" — in the end He will cut you down. What are you waiting for—for God Himself to send you to hell? But if He sends you there, you already know that then there will be no more remedy for you. The Lord keeps silence, but He does not keep silence forever; when the time of vengeance comes, He is silent no more. «Haec fecisti, et tacui. Existimasti inique, quod ero tui similis? Arguam te, et statuam contra faciem tuam» — "These things you have done, and I kept silence. You thought unjustly that I was like you; I will rebuke you, and set them before your face" (Ps. 49:21).
He will set before you the mercies He has shown you, and He will make those very mercies judge you and condemn you.
Affections and Prayers
Ah, my God, woe to me if from this day forward I were not faithful to You, and returned to betraying You after the light You now give me! This light is a sign that You wish to pardon me. I repent, O supreme Good, of all the injuries I have done You in having offended You, infinite Goodness. I hope for pardon through Your blood, and I hope for it with certainty; but if I were to turn my back on You again, I see that I would deserve a hell made on purpose for me. And this is what makes me tremble, O God of my soul: I can return to losing Your grace. I think of how many times I have promised You to be faithful, and then have again rebelled against You. Ah, Lord, do not permit it: do not abandon me to this great misfortune of seeing myself once more made Your enemy. Send me every chastisement, but not this. «Ne permittas me separari a Te» — "Do not permit me to be separated from You." If You ever see that I would offend You again, let me die first. I am content with the most tormenting of deaths rather than have to weep over the misery of being once more deprived of Your grace. «Ne permittas me separari a Te» — "Do not permit me to be separated from You." I repeat it, my God; and grant that I may always repeat it to You: «Ne permittas me separari a Te» — "Do not permit me to be separated from You." I love You, my dear Redeemer; I no longer wish to be parted from You: by the merits of Your death, give me a love so great that it binds me to You in such a way that I can never again break loose from it.
O Mary, my Mother, if I return to offending God, I fear that You too will abandon me. Help me, then, with Your prayers; obtain for me holy perseverance and love for Jesus Christ.